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T O P I C R E V I E WAmi AnneI don't know how to describe this. I will tell you the situation.My mother is a really bad bully, My father is a wimp type.He called me and told me that the people at their retirement facility were giving him dirty looks at dinner because they thought he was a "bad husband"My mother trashes him to people and then they don't like him.I got REALLY angry at her and really let her know.Then, he kind of sided with her and they made me like I was the crazy one.------------------ Want to Read Simple, Fun,Sexy Articles on Astrology? Check Me Out, DUDE. http://www.mychristianpsychic.com/Ami AnneGod gave me a very good chart. It is one of the better charts I have seen. It is very logical. I have Alice conj my mercury exact. Alice was sane in a crazy world. My blessings go on and on BUT I feel I am always being made crazy by my reality being altered.This above is an example.Can anyone relate?------------------ Want to Read Simple, Fun,Sexy Articles on Astrology? Check Me Out, DUDE. http://www.mychristianpsychic.com/ValentineNo, I can't relate. All I can say is your dad, despite his complaining to you, accepts his submissive role with your domineering mother. No need to worry about them.Ami Anne quote:Originally posted by Valentine:No, I can't relate. All I can say is your dad, despite his complaining to you, accepts his submissive role with your domineering mother. No need to worry about them.Yes, thanks V!------------------ Want to Read Simple, Fun,Sexy Articles on Astrology? Check Me Out, DUDE. http://www.mychristianpsychic.com/DeepFreeze quote:Originally posted by Valentine:No, I can't relate. All I can say is your dad, despite his complaining to you, accepts his submissive role with your domineering mother. No need to worry about them.Read my mind. ReadingTheStars95Agh.. I hate being sided against with my family.. Especially when there are times when I feel like one of them siding against me is doing it to please the other..He probably stood up for your mother because he was afraid not to, not because he accepts your mom's behavior. Doesn't sound like he is in a very happy position in life right now.At least, that is how I see it.OdettePeople protect their abusers. It reminds me of Stockholm syndrome. It's sad, but it does happen. Victims of home violence are often protective of their abusive spouses and it's very difficult to get them to testify in court. I know your mum is very psychologically abusive, not physically - but that is enough to harm a person who is more psychologically sensitive like your dad.I completely understand your frustration (because I've been there!) and I'm sorry you're constantly put in this situation The problem is - you just can't help someone who won't help themselves no matter how much you care for them. And you have your own life to focus on!Ami AnneYou are so wise, Odette.------------------ Want to Read Simple, Fun,Sexy Articles on Astrology? Check Me Out, DUDE. http://www.mychristianpsychic.com/Ami AnneI found my answer. Odette helped me to get it straight in my mind.If ANYONE wants to take away your reality, you need to walk away.You can take lots of things in relationships because no one is perfect and people hurt people, as a matter of human nature.However, if someone is so sick that they want/have to distort your reality in order for you to be in a relationship with them, you have to leave.Your sanity is worth it ------------------ Want to Read Simple, Fun,Sexy Articles on Astrology? Check Me Out, DUDE. http://www.mychristianpsychic.com/SoltzeSome people are just used to bad relationship dinamycs. It looks really crazy from the outside but they don't want it any other way. I know someone who is constantly complaining of psychological abuse and cheating and won't quit the guy. My parents complain about each other to me, and fight a lot but divorced each other and married again a few years ago so...do like me cover your ears and ignore. I guess------------------Do thy will___________Sun in GeminiMoon/Pluto ScorpioSwanlake quote:Originally posted by Ami Anne:I don't know how to describe this. I will tell you the situation.My mother is a really bad bully, My father is a wimp type.He called me and told me that the people at their retirement facility were giving him dirty looks at dinner because they thought he was a "bad husband"My mother trashes him to people and then they don't like him.I got REALLY angry at her and really let her know.Then, he kind of sided with her and they made me like I was the crazy one.Ami Anne, my Dear, I wonder why you STILL haven't let go of your Mother???? Why you STILL have UNREALISTIC expectations of her???If she had been in an accident which left her brain damaged, would you STILL feel disappointed , becoming upset if she acted in a way that didn't seem reasonable, fair or rational?- NO! (I'm sure it wouldn't affect you in the same way)WELL, just because you can't see any (tangible) physical reason for her disappointing/upsetting behavior, YOU MUST LEARN TO SEE HER AS IF SHE WERE DAMAGED.(Because, in fact she IS. Damaged in her psyche, from her past. It's invisible)CAN'T you BELIEVE this?Look. FACT: NO MOTHER in her RIGHT mind would CONSCIOUSLY choose to be hurtful to her child(as you experienced her)Your mother has always in your lifetime been "locked up" & lost, a prisoner of her subconscious mind.She is not aware of her behavior. Never has been.Your Dad learned to cope with her somehow.But he has different role in her life.When you finally let go, you will be free. Ami AnneI KNOW, Swan. I am trying and have been since my teens, but not doing too well, it seems lol------------------ Want to Read Simple, Fun,Sexy Articles on Astrology? Check Me Out, DUDE. http://www.mychristianpsychic.com/
My mother is a really bad bully, My father is a wimp type.
He called me and told me that the people at their retirement facility were giving him dirty looks at dinner because they thought he was a "bad husband"
My mother trashes him to people and then they don't like him.
I got REALLY angry at her and really let her know.
Then, he kind of sided with her and they made me like I was the crazy one.
------------------ Want to Read Simple, Fun,Sexy Articles on Astrology? Check Me Out, DUDE.
http://www.mychristianpsychic.com/
It is very logical. I have Alice conj my mercury exact. Alice was sane in a crazy world.
My blessings go on and on BUT I feel I am always being made crazy by my reality being altered.
This above is an example.
Can anyone relate?
quote:Originally posted by Valentine:No, I can't relate. All I can say is your dad, despite his complaining to you, accepts his submissive role with your domineering mother. No need to worry about them.
Yes, thanks V!
Read my mind.
He probably stood up for your mother because he was afraid not to, not because he accepts your mom's behavior. Doesn't sound like he is in a very happy position in life right now.
At least, that is how I see it.
I completely understand your frustration (because I've been there!) and I'm sorry you're constantly put in this situation The problem is - you just can't help someone who won't help themselves no matter how much you care for them. And you have your own life to focus on!
If ANYONE wants to take away your reality, you need to walk away.
You can take lots of things in relationships because no one is perfect and people hurt people, as a matter of human nature.
However, if someone is so sick that they want/have to distort your reality in order for you to be in a relationship with them, you have to leave.
Your sanity is worth it
------------------Do thy will___________Sun in GeminiMoon/Pluto Scorpio
quote:Originally posted by Ami Anne:I don't know how to describe this. I will tell you the situation.My mother is a really bad bully, My father is a wimp type.He called me and told me that the people at their retirement facility were giving him dirty looks at dinner because they thought he was a "bad husband"My mother trashes him to people and then they don't like him.I got REALLY angry at her and really let her know.Then, he kind of sided with her and they made me like I was the crazy one.
Ami Anne, my Dear, I wonder why you STILL haven't let go of your Mother???? Why you STILL have UNREALISTIC expectations of her???
If she had been in an accident which left her brain damaged, would you STILL feel disappointed , becoming upset if she acted in a way that didn't seem reasonable, fair or rational?- NO! (I'm sure it wouldn't affect you in the same way)
WELL, just because you can't see any (tangible) physical reason for her disappointing/upsetting behavior, YOU MUST LEARN TO SEE HER AS IF SHE WERE DAMAGED.(Because, in fact she IS. Damaged in her psyche, from her past. It's invisible)
CAN'T you BELIEVE this?
Look. FACT: NO MOTHER in her RIGHT mind would CONSCIOUSLY choose to be hurtful to her child(as you experienced her)
Your mother has always in your lifetime been "locked up" & lost, a prisoner of her subconscious mind.She is not aware of her behavior. Never has been.Your Dad learned to cope with her somehow.But he has different role in her life.
When you finally let go, you will be free.
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